You might live in Utah if…
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…if your coffee maker at work is only used by the occasional guest from out of state.
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…if you know the difference between a steak house and a stake center
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…if you get the 24th of July off of work
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…if you wear sandals on Monday, but pull your winter coat back out for Tuesday
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…if you think Seven Peaks is the happiest place on earth
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…if you’ve ever dressed like a pioneer and dragged a wooden cart behind you for miles with fifty other kids your age.
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…if the only beach you’ve ever been to is Lagoona Beach.
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…if the greeting card section in your grocery store is bigger than the alcohol aisle
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…if you’ve ever began the pledge of allegiance with “We are daughters…”
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…if you wear flip flops with your sweatshirt in February.
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… if you are already going 5 over the speed limit in the fast lane, and everyone is still passing you
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… if Diet Coke is your guilty pleasure
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…if you know the Y and the U represent much more than just letter in the alphabet
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…if you have ever made “frappe” out of green sherbet and 7-up.
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…if you have ever prayed that the donuts and “frappe” will “nourish and strengthen your body”
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…if you have enough wheat stored in your basement to end world hunger.
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…if when asked to entertain a group of small children you rely on your memory of Girls/Scout camp songs.
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…if you have at least three tupperware bowls in your kitchen that are not yours, and the rest of them have a piece of tape with your name on it.
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…if you’ve ever heard the KSL traffic report end with “in the name of Jesus Christ, amen”
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…if, when you go off to college, you can’t cook a meal for less than nine people
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…if the boys in your family can’t get their drivers license until they are an Eagle Scout
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…if your family owns a wheat grinder
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…if you know anyone who has believed to have received a spiritual confirmation of the impending win at today’s football game.
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…if you’ve ever asked someone on a date where they had to open 90 bottles of soda, or popped 50 balloons, or eaten 40,000 Ding Dongs before they knew who was asking them to Prom.
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…then if they had to dig through a tub of butter to find the answer, even if it was no
These are just a few of the signs that point only to life in the Bubble. Please share with us some of your own!
If you have to check your family’s genealogy before dating a girl to ensure you aren’t related!
…if your nephew or niece is older than one of his uncles or aunts.
…if you’re “cussing” vocabulary includes, flip, freak, and fudge with the bonus of “Oh, bump on a log!”
If you wear a flak jacket and shorts on the same day.
Love it.
I agreed with almost all of them, too. (I live in SLC.)
Green jell-o with carrots mixed in doesn’t seem strange.
You can pronounce Tooele.
The U is not just a letter – Neither is the Y.
You are not surprised to hear words like “Darn, Fetch, Flip”, “Oh, My Heck” and “Shoot”.
Your tulips get snowed on three times after they come up and twice more after they bloom.
Hunting season is a school holiday.
The largest liquor store is the state government.
You can go skiing and play golf on the same day.
30% humidity is muggy and almost unbearable.
Somewhere in your family tree is a polygamist.
You know the difference between a ‘Steak House’ and a ‘Stake House’.
You can see the stars at night
You were an aunt or uncle before you were three.
Your spouse’s mother was pregnant at your wedding.
You have more children than you can find biblical names for.
Your family considers a trip to McDonald’s a night out..
Your first child was conceived on your honeymoon.
You drink Coke from a brown paper bag.
You consider a temple recommend a credit reference.
You believe that you must be 18 or older to order coffee at a restaurant.
You wonder why fire truck drivers honk when you drive 35 mph in the left lane on the freeway.
You think Jack Daniels is a country western singer.
You can make Jell-O salad without the recipe.
You have two gallons of ice cream in your freezer at all times.
Your father-in-law thinks Ronald Reagan was a liberal.
Cars in the slow lane are traveling the fastest; cars in the fast lane are traveling the slowest; cars in the middle lanes are always trying to exit.
You have to ask for the uncensored version of “Titanic.”
Hotel rooms all have the Book of Mormon.
You buy your wardrobe at the local grocery superstore.
You learn about the Mormon Church by taking history in elementary school.
Schools stay open, even if two feet of snow falls overnight, but close for the opening of hunting season.
People wear shorts and T-shirts if the temperature rises above 32 degrees.
There is a church on every corner, but they all teach the same thing.
The most popular public transportation system is a ski lift.
People drive to Idaho (or Arizona) to pick up a gallon of milk so they can play the lottery.
In-state college football rivalries are bigger than the Super Bowl.
Every driveway has a minivan and a pickup truck.
When you buy a new vehicle, cigarette lighters are optional equipment but gun and ski racks are standard.
Every time a new family moves into your neighborhood, the local elementary school has to hire a new teacher.
Your paycheck has an additional 10 percent deduction.
“Temple recommends” is acceptable identification for cashing a check.
More movies are filmed in your town than in Hollywood.
You make a toast with red punch at your wedding reception.
You have more raw wheat stored than some Third World countries.
Your idea of a good time is playing Pictionary in the cultural hall.
Your idea of a wild party is a six pack of Pepsi and a PG-13 movie.
You measure Kool-Aid by parts per million.
You think “You’re a 10 cow wife” is a compliment.
when you hear the word bishop and know they are not referring to a game of chess
If you know what it’s like to have at least 5 people ask ‘where were you yesterday?’ if you weren’t at church on Sunday.
If you’re 26 and still not married, you can consider yourself an ‘Old Maid’